Tuesday, March 5, 2013
Learning not to worry and just see how things work out is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.I am not a patient person. I like game plans. I like being prepared. I like knowing what is going to happen.
Certain events lately have led me to have to let go of that controlling/ need for answers part of my personality. It's a lesson I know I need but is hard. It's so hard when it all can change/ will change my life but yet I don't have the control over it. I needed some signs that things do work out. When you stop worrying, when you pray and when you let go. Boy oh boy did I get a few.
1. Pulled over for speeding twice in one weekend ( I know. I know.) First time pulled over in 2 years and first ticket in 5 years. First officer gives me a warning along with giving several samples of brotherly advice on how to keep myself safe on the rest of the journey. Second officer gives me the ticket without hesitation. I immediately cry once he leaves( I do not use tears to get out of tickets) because I am worried. How am I gonna pay for this? Will it make my insurance go up? I decide right then that I will say a prayer and continue with my plan for my savings ( which does not include the $135 needed for my disregard for the law). The very next weekend I get $185 handed to me. I also get to take defensive driving so it will not be on my insurance. Things always work out.
2. For some reason the way paychecks fell this month I was going to have to use my savings to pay my bills. I noticed today that my student loan payment had not been processed yet. I call them to find out that they drug their feet on my paperwork resulting in me getting to skip this month's payment. Instead of spending my savings I get to add to it! Things always work out for the better.
3. My bills are going up. My income has gone down. I see a few really unexpected costs over the next year. I'm not going to worry. It will work out. I am looking for a roommate. I have faith that the right one will be put in front of me at the right time.
4. I walked into a bar reluctantly one random cold night in January and walked out with the opportunity to get to know someone that there is no reason on earth we should have met. Different parts of the world, different jobs and journeys. Who knows how it will work out but I have a feeling he is being used to teach me to let go.
No more grumpy mood this week. Just love.